I'll do something.
All know this, Life is becoming heavier day by day.
I have decided to take this bull by its horns.
I'll be posting something which would help someone to forget his tensions for a little while.
So wait, I'm coming
posted by Tarun | 2:06 AM
1 Comments:
JACK & JILL
Jack & Jill were on their way home from the bar one night and Jack got pulled over by the police. The officer told Jack that he was stopped because his tail light was burned out. Jack said, "I'm very sorry officer, I didn't realize it was out, I'll get it fixed right away." Just then Jill said, "I knew this would happen when I told you two days ago to get that light fixed." So the officer asked for Jack's license and after looking at it said, "Sir your
license has expired." And again Jack apologized and mentioned that he didn't realize that it had expired and would take care of it first thing in the morning. Jill said, "I told you a week ago that the state sent you a letter telling you that your license had expired." Well by this time Jack is a bit upset with his wife contradicting him in front of the officer and he said in a rather loud voice, "#$&% Jill, will you SHUT UP!" The officer then leaned
over toward Jill and asked. "Does your husband always talk to you like that?" Jill replied, "ONLY WHEN HE'S DRUNK."
HATE FRIDAYS
One day, a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair, he has his first meeting with a demon.
Demon: Why so glum, chum?
Guy: What do you think? I'm in hell.
Demon: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. You a drinkin' man?
Guy: Sure, I love to drink.
Demon: Well, you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays, that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet Tab... we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more.
Guy: Gee, that sounds great.
Demon: You a smoker?
Guy: You better believe it.
Demon: All right! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from around the world and smoke our friggin' lungs out. If you get cancer, it's okay... you're already dead.
Guy: Golly!
Demon: I bet you like to gamble.
Guy: Yes, as a matter of fact I do.
Demon: Good, because Wednesday is gambling day. Craps, blackjack, horse races, you name it. We even opened up a pai gow poker table.
Guy: Gosh, I never played pai gow before...
Demon: Well now you can. You like to do drugs?
Guy: Yes, I love to do drugs. You don't mean...
Demon: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want, and if you overdose, it's okay...you're already dead.
Guy: Neat! I never realized that hell was such a swingin' place!
Demon: You gay?
Guy: Uh, no.
Demon: Oooh, you're gonna hate Fridays.
BRIEF
Sardar Gurbachan Singh is appearing for his University final examination. He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window. He then removes his turban and throws it away as well. His shirt, pant, socks and watch follow suit.
The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on. Oye, I am only following the instructions 'Answer in brief'.
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